Tuesday, April 22, 2008

The Black Wiggles

The ways of the Spookies are dark, and necessarily obscured by elaborate ritual.  For without a degree of secrecy, their magnificence would be unleashed into a world unprepared for such awesome power.  After only a few days with them I have been able to discover a few of their secrets.  At great risk to myself, I disclose them to you now.

The Spooky Men wear black.   

The absence of colour is an obvious external display of the emptiness that lies within.  For much of the individual spooky man's personality is eliminated in the course of his training and induction into the group.  We learn through a long and painful process to abandon any sense of ego, assertion or even purpose, as we merge ourselves into one seamless, amorphous, clamorous black whole.  While we are many, we are one.  (And from all the lands on earth we come).

The Spooky Men sing often of Georgia.  

The influence of the ex-Soviet republic of Georgia is strongly felt by all Spooky Men.  From our overriding ignorance of fine detail about this place, we draw our strength of purpose to learn more (or to at least sing loudly).  1, 4 and 5 are the numbers which carry us forward, ever-striving to make one big noise together at end.  For while in unison there may be strength, in the many, we the find the beauty of lots and lots.

The Spooky Men follow their leader.

The Spooky Men draw their inspiration from many sources, crystallised into the Spooky Constitution and inspired by Saint Ken (or Kevin in parts of New South Wales) the Usual. Of these I will speak no further now. I fear that my writings are being observed. Last night I was discovered paying close attention to the teachings of our leader. This clearly marked me as an outsider and not to be fully trusted.

"Our intention must be the same as our pretension" (Stephen Taberner)

"I powerfully and serenely resolve to tell you that thing that I was going to tell you, as soon as I remember what it was" (from the wisdom of Saint Ken the Usual)

The Spooky Men are welcomed in many places of worship. 

Whatever the belief system, so long as the audience adhere to the Anglican faith, the Spooky Men are welcomed into houses of gods.  In a town by the sea (neither of which I will name here), we marvelled at the intricate icons adorning the wall.  Agog at the frog, we shared in a moment of spiritual sharing after our own style. 


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